Monday begins the March of the Oatmeals

But first, let's take a look at another fine breakfast tradition, the Nutty Buddy. I think this is a food item that deserves more serious consideration from nutritionists. It looks like a waffle, so that makes it a good breakfast. It also has peanut butter in it. I ate this one, well, this pair, on the way from the 72nd street 2 stop to the Lincoln Center. Also, at $1.39 per box of 8, they are a fantastic nutritional value.


Ok, now for the Oatmeal Revolution! You think it's boring. You think it's too hot for oatmeal. You think Wilfred Brimley should have shaved the mustache. YOU ARE WRONG!

This is your standard classic oatmeal with just a few bells and whistles. As a rule, I don't cook food with fewer than 7 ingredients. When I make eggs I find small, chemically inert objects to put in the pan and take out later.
So, in keeping with this grand ideal, in addition to the oats and water, this breakfast contained salt, brown sugar, a tablespoon of butter and a dash of cinnamon. That's seven ingredients if you count the BS about me only ever cooking with at least 7 ingredients as an ingredient itself. Mmmmm, bull shit. My favorite.
From cold water to oatmeal takes maybe 10 minutes, tops. As soon as it has taken up all the water, I pour it into my Tupperware and throw it into my bag. By the time I get to work, it has cooled to a very pleasant temperature for summer eating.
This wasn't just breakfast. I ate the oatmeal in bites as I worked through the morning and didn't finish the bowl till about 2PM. There was the vanilla yogurt on the side, but the slow eating over the course of 5 hours was very good for me. Even as the oatmeal cooled, it still remained engaging. It also led me to realize that as the food cooled, my desire for sugar decreased and my desire for salt increased. Fascinating, huh?
Expect a new oatmeal every day this week. I plan on pushing past the grey, cardboard walls of what you thought you knew about oatmeal and take this old favorite in some new directions.


Not a preview shot of upcoming oatmeal, This is a closeup of the base couscous and vegetables I made for dinner. After finishing my oatmeal around 2, I managed to make it to dinner with two handfuls of microwave pop corn, a pineapple lifesaver and
A stick of celery with peanut butter. How glorious does that look? How triumphant? Truly, this is the food of kings.

But back to dinner. I was aiming for light summer fare without too much heat involved in the cooking. Couscous is great for that, because given enough time, you don't even have to boil the water. I did, just to speed the process, though it didn't boil for very long. I also dropped a tablespoon of butter and a shot of adobo to the water as it boiled. After the water was boiling and the butter had melted, I poured the hot water into dry couscous in a glass bowl and then mixed in some snow peas.

This gave them just the lightest edge of steaming without overdoing them. After it cooled for about 5 minutes, I fluffed it and added diced red onions, red peppers, carrots, tomato and a very liberal amount of cilantro.

Meanwhile, in a small frying pan, I fried a slice of bacon and about a half inch worth of a chorizo link till their fat rendered, and then reserved the meat on the side while I fried shrimp and scallops in the fat.


The scallops were dusted with adobo and allowed to soak up the saltiness for about 15 minutes. The shrimp had a similar marinade time in fresh lime juice and a light dash of adobo. I fried the shrimp first, adding the scallops second, adding a shot of beer to the pan to prevent the bits stuck to the bottom of the pan from burning. The great thing about shrimp and scallops is they take almost no time to finish cooking, so there was not a long process of slaving over a hot stove.

By way of a dressing, I ground whole cumin, taragon, oregano, chili powder and a few black peppercorns in my mortar and added them to a cup of whole milk yogurt.

Then I plated the couscous over a cucumber dill salad. The cucumbers were sliced and salted with adobo when I started cooking and allowed to set in the fridge. Right before I started frying the sea food, I tossed in a dash of vegetable oil, a liberal slopping of balsamic vinegar and a very generous heap of fresh dill.

I poured a few tablespoons of the yogurt sauce over the top of the couscous, arranged the seafood in a little flower spread on top of the yogurt, and then, to finish, I sprinkled on the bacon and chorizo pieces that I used for fat to fry the seafood in.

It was very light and filling summer fare, perhaps too light for me. I could have stood to have been a lot more liberal with the yogurt sauce. Crunchy health food types would probably prefer this version, maybe minus the bacon-fried sea food, but I refuse to live in fear of fat. Here's a nice fence-straddler dish between indulgence and calorie counting.

Speaking of calorie counting, I would be remiss if I did not also mention my ice cream sandwich for desert/temperature control. Just a generic black rectangular cookie with white ice cream in the center. I don't even know if fancy descriptions like "chocolate" and "vanilla" are appropriate. They're just good freezer swill.